Is there anything more inconvenient than a common cold? Half the time you have one, you don't even feel that badly -- you're just annoyed at its seemingly endless list of symptoms. For give or take a week, you (1) can't taste food, (2) sleep terribly, (3) have to actually think about breathing, (4) disturb everyone's peace wherever you go with disgusting throat and nasal sound effects, (5) battle a nose that seamlessly and inexplicably fluctuates between runny and stopped-up, (6) can't find a comfortable room temperature, (7) sound like Ben Stein, and, maybe worst of all, (8) kind of look like Ben Stein.
And so, for give or take a week, you have to carry around tissues as if you're on the fringe of an emotional breakdown around the clock. Or you can be a guy with a handkerchief.
Never a handkerchief-type of dude myself, on the surface the idea makes sense to carry that cloth backup in your pocket. And in the breast pocket of a blazer, it can be quite dapper (a word that doesn't get enough play if I do say so myself). But all the allure of a handkerchief is lost when you weigh its deliberate, functional purpose, which is to capture and store your discharged snot.
Yes, that square stitching of 100% cotton was woven with your mucus in mind, covering your sneezes and coughs and batting literal cleanup to your face's many obscene, uncongealed emissions. And, I agree, that is repulsive, which is why I don't keep a snot rag fabric in my pocket. No, no, I'm not blowing my nose and wrapping up the surprise in something that I'll stuff and conceal in my pants, only to reach for it and reuse it later. Once that textile touches my nose or mouth, into the trash it goes. I'm not keen to revisit that released respiratory residue.
With that in mind, handkerchiefs in my world would be used once and then permanently tossed. ASAP. They don't need to linger around, rubbing against and smearing across your clothes, even if only on the inside.
Obviously that approach is not ideal, nor might it be cost efficient. So, I say just stick to a tissue -- and only one use per tissue. We're potentially talking about a lot of tissue here, true, but under these circumstances, I propose wastefulness over distastefulness.
Ditch the handkerchiefs for any reason other than cranking up your dapper factor. Close calls in sports, beautiful women in skin-tight leggings, and your poker hand after the flop all deserve a second look; your phlegm and mucus, however, do not.
Handkerchiefs are wonderful. I collect them....old ones, because they remind me of a loved one and they are useful. If used properly, one can be quite clean and tidy with multiple uses. Use a corner, fold it over, next time new corner, etc. And it is a money saver and produces much less trash. As much as anything, it is easy on the nose and not so much lint. Common sense says it is smart.
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