Hitler

I always promised myself I’d refrain from ever writing anything political here. Forgive me.

But don’t you just think of pure evil when you hear the name Hitler? Of course you do, which is why it’s so often used in the world of politics to describe opponents of someone’s agenda. Which is also why it’s the single most ridiculous human comparison to make.

Sadly, this synonym for malevolent insanity of unreachable levels is tossed around in political rings and the "blogosphere" (a word almost as annoying as people who compare other people to Hitler) like it’s a perfectly accurate, articulate critique of a politician whom they oppose.

Comparing someone to Hitler is the cheap, juvenile "your-mom" of political jabs. It’s when you’ve run out of actual fact-based talking points and creative comebacks and got nowhere else to go except taking it as extreme and left-field as possible; so you pull out the Hitler card in front of the live TV cameras or doodle a Hitler ‘stache on a Xeroxed headshot and throw it on a sign. (Do people call awful black-and-white copies "Xeroxes" anymore, or was that savvy technological argot laid to rest 20 years ago?)

When a person reaches for the Hitler-resemblance-in-policies-or-tactics accusation, he's intentionally aiming for the PR jugular of the highest, most outlandish mudslinging proportions. The obvious intent here is to demonize someone by providing any sort of connection between that person and the half-mustachioed leader behind the Holocaust. It's silly. Any shared trait you may have with Hitler hardly necessitates a finger-pointing "Ah-ha!" moment. ("You like cookies and the color blue, huh? You know who else liked cookies and the color blue? Yeah, that's right -- Hitler! Reveal your swastika!")

Look, I don't like politicians either. Matter of fact, I can think of maybe three whom I don't strongly distrust (and, yes, both sides of the aisle are represented in those three, thank you very much). But when a person tries to link a politician to the likeness of Hitler in any fashion, I often wonder if that person has any clue as to how dangerously strong of a charge he's making. Here's a man who was so corrupt, so acrimoniously, psychotically corrupt, that he wanted to graphically annihilate an entire race off the face of the planet -- and actually acted on that desire, ordering the systematic exodus and execution of several millions of human beings -- and this is the man to whom some talking head with a radio show wants to try drawing parallels alongside a dopey politician because of his proposed agenda on health care? Or tax? Or hunting down a terrorist? I mean, Hitler was inventing new degrees of atrocity -- atrocity that not even Carrot Top’s surgically butchered mug can emit -- yet a random political or social commentator with a mic in his face genuinely believes a lawmaker or president is going to lead us down a path that mirrors the Third Reich?

In the past 10 years, there have been an ungodly amount of picket signs and t-shirts and billboards and commercials and bumper stickers that hint at or just outright accuse someone is Hitleresque in six words, images, or symbols or fewer. Disagree with the politician, fine, but seriously, think about the severity of the charge, man. Think about that. Bush was not Hitler. Obama is not Hitler. [Insert given political figure] is not Hitler. There will never be anyone who touches 50 miles of the brink of evil displayed by Hitler. There just won't be.

So any validity you very well could have in the bullet points about your opponent immediately go right out the window once you drop the H-bomb. Calling such a perverse equation "disingenuous" is in itself disingenuous -- because it's beyond disingenuous. Or any other word in the dictionary.

Try telling a Jew or a Pole that you think so-and-so running for office is like Hitler. Afterward your mug will probably share more in common with Carrot Top's than that politician's agenda does with Hitler's.